Let me back up a little bit. Because my “week” actually started on the 2nd, aka my last (sort of) day off. But I won’t back up quite that far, just to Saturday, when it starts to get interesting.
The start of my second consecutive full weekend on L&D call. Which, of course, I don’t really mind. *Except* when I spend all day teeing up every patient so the intern on nights can deliver them. No deliveries for me. All for the night intern. Really, I like the night intern, heck I was actually working days for her, but that’s just wrong man. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Starts off fine until I have to do an ER consult. (Cue Darth Vader’s theme song. Which involuntarily plays in my head whenever I have to do something that is so bad I would rather have my hand hacked off by a light saber. Or something like that.) Before I even walk into the ER I get cat called by all the patients waiting in the intake line who spot my white coat, and think yelling at me will get me to magically start chucking handfulls of percocets at them like a grand marshal at the founder’s day parade. (Or something like that. Mental note: NEVER use the front entrance to the ER. Ever. Again)
And then I walk in, and the same realizations hit me that hit me approximately 12 seconds into my horrifferous ER rotation – A) This place Stinks. B) There are way too many males here. And they all look much too comfortable being here. C) Omg. I am SUCH an OB/GYN. When did that happen?! And P.S. Get me out of this H*ll Hole!!!! I worked very quickly to get myself and my poor patient out of there, feeling extremely, conspicuously, uncomfortably out of place the entire time while simultaneously awkwardly fending off random requests for sandwiches, bus fare, IV Dilaudid, etc.
(The song I decided was the Official Song of Intern Year while on the horrifferous rotation. Because it was playing EVERY time I drove to and from the ER. And, well, pretty much sums up how I felt.)
Then I went back to L&D (where I BELONG, thank you JESUS), and delivered some babies. One of which was delivered to this song:
(No kidding. How fricking cool is that????)
And then MONDAY happened.
(That’s my Monday song.)
Back to my research rotation, and because I was on L&D all weekend and haven’t had 10 minutes to put a load of laundry in since, Oh, forever, had no “good” underwear and was forced to delve into the very depths of the closet to retrieve the dreaded, absolutely-in-case-of-dire-laundry-emergency wedgiefying underwear, spent the rest of the day trying to appear “bright” and “engaged” and “hard working,” when all I really (desperately) wanted to do was pick my @ss.
(I drive to work and hear this song on Awesome Big City Indie Station for the first time. I realize later that I am probably the Last Person On Earth to have heard it, but don’t really care because it is just so good.)
Yeah, it’s going to be a good day. I can’t just feel it. And, I wind up the finding out that I actually get to go on the ridiculously amazing international elective that I have been accepted to because my department is going to cough up funding. I just have like 4 months to learn Spanish now. Sure. No big.
And then I go to quickly put the “finishing touches” on my first (Big Scary) Journal Club presentation, which should take all of 15 minutes.
3 hours later I drive home in tears.
I call Dr. LabRat, PhD extraordinaire, and exactly 43 seconds later, my power point is fixed. Make a Stay Calm and Call Dr. LabRat meme for her Facebook page and call it a night.
Get through my first (Big Scary) Journal Club presentation. I was the last person presenting and was so hopped up on adrenaline by the time it was my turn, end up whizzing and stuttering through the entire thing, only to look up and see what I can only interpret as looks of shock and, well, I don’t even know how to describe some of those expressions. Which, fine, may have been mostly in reaction to my The End! slide. Which had a collage of pictures like this:
(What? It was pertinent. Sort of. You people have no sense of humor.)
And then I had a meeting with one of my attendings about an issue that had incidentally arisen on my research rotation. And, magically, my very own crazy awesome (Yep, pretty much rocks my world every time I think about it) resident research project was born. It really is my baby. It is of my own creation and will take a ton of work, devotion, sacrifice, and nurturing, but I love it (like only a mother can), expect it to do great things and make me proud one day, and in the end, I know it will be worth it.
And then, I finally get to spend to some QT (i.e. I hammer away at my laptop while she makes residency look fun and effortless) with fellow intern Dr. Legs.
(The song that starts involuntarily playing in my head whenever I think of Dr. Legs. I feel at least 67.3% taller, smarter, sexier and just all-around More Amazeballs any time I am within a 14 foot radius of her. She is rapidly becoming one of my favorite people in the Universe.)
And again, back to the research rotation. Last day. 4 huge assignments, and right at the end, I don’t know if I can make it. I text The Writer for inspiration in a fit of desperation. He sends me this:
I laugh, call him a weirdo, tell him I love him, and (still can’t believe it) finish.
I am officially, half-way done with Intern Year.
I car dance all the way home, courtesy of Awesome Big City Indie Station.
And you know what I’m doing tonight? NOT homework. I am BLOGGING instead, and then, I am going to go to bed EARLY. Yeah, b*tches!!!!!